Spirit of Fear

Where do our fears come from?

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)

So since my fears do not come from God, then they must be one of Satan's tactics to make sure I'm not content.  To work this backwards, if I don't have a spirit of love and a sound mind, then I am not in tune with God's plans for me.  This perspective helps me identify areas of my life that need to be corrected and also lead me to finding the solutions.  I tend to take on too much or blame myself for the wrong parts of a problem I'm facing.  Feeling unworthy, or hopeless or giving up is not constructive or healing and will not lead me to a solution or a way to learn from my mistakes.  This is also a distraction from Satan.  He does not want me to learn from my mistakes so I can improve, or trust God.  He wants me doubting, being afraid, and missing the point.  He also helps me to forget this very principle -- more often than not.  But once I am reminded that God is providing a spirit of love, power and a sound mind, it turns my focus away from the destructive thoughts of myself and provides an avenue for correcting those thoughts and intentions back to God.  

I think identifying accurately the source of our struggles is the key to dissolving them and learning from them.  

This is one of my favorite prayers from Stormie O'Martian's book, "Prayers for Emotional Wholeness"

"Lord, set me free from worry about the future and the bad things I fear could happen.  Help me to focus instead on the situations I face today and Your great power to see me through each one victoriously.  Bless my health, my work, my relationships, my decisions, my finances, my friends, and my family.  I place my life fully in Your hands and trust that You, Lord, will help me and guide me on the path to complete wholeness and success in my life."

Mathew 6:34

"Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about it's own things.  Sufficient for the day is it's own trouble."

Never pray for an easier life...

We all struggle with things and have countless choices in how to deal with these struggles.  This can be anything from minor inconveniences to major events in life.  I am surprised at how easily I deal with some things, and equally surprised at how poorly I seem to deal with and understand others.  We need to understand our fears and needs and emotions and learn where they come from and why we have these reactions to life’s events.  We must learn what our strengths and weaknesses are.  It’s not always easy to get a clear view of ourselves. And where independence and pride can block our self-awareness, we must turn to God for guidance from His word and godly counsel from the people God puts in our lives.  

In my search to conquer some of these challenges, I like to start with a passage from James that I read often, but I continue to struggle with. 

James 1:2-4

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.  But let patience have it’s perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” 

So, in other words, the state of patience = lacking nothing.  I would love to feel like I ‘lack nothing’.  But how often do we really feel that way.  We wish for this or that, complain about this or that, or express in many other ways our being discontent.  This is not a peaceful life nor is it the one God wants for me so I believe He has provided a way for me to learn how to deal with negativity and tragedy in a healthy way.  And I will be stronger each time I follow His guidance and succeed in overcoming my challenges.  This doesn’t mean that I have to like everything that has been put in my path, but I do have the ability to get through it and be stronger in the process if I look at it through God’s eyes and see His purpose in it.  

Let’s imagine that our emotional response is stress, fear or anxiety.  We are to have a respectful and reverential fear or awe of God.  But not of the events He allows to happen in our life.  Anxiety is to fear or worry about what you think might happen.  The cure for fear is experiencing the perfect love of Jesus Christ, which casts out all fear.  And don’t forget - you don’t have to face your fears alone.  

Hebrews 13:5-6 says, "Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” 6 So we may boldly say: “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”

I remind myself the definition of stress is when we perceive our physical, mental or emotional needs or desires are not going to be met and/or we perceive that demands placed on us exceed our resources or ability to meet those demands.   When I look at it this way, I realize that the only way this can happen to me is if I am prioritizing earthly desires and expectations from myself or others above God's expectations.   God promises to take care of me and provide for my needs as long as I am putting Him first in my life.  So if I think I need something I am not being provided then I must be valuing a lifestyle, appearance, condition or expectation that exceeds what God has provided.  This is so humbling to me.  Who am I to argue with God, my Creator, or disagree with what He has provided me?  

This is one of the ways I become perfected in patience.  Because timing is also a part of our expectations and is often the key to overcoming many challenges.  We want everything now.  We don’t really ever want to go through it so the quicker we get past it the better.  But in this way, we cheat ourselves out of the very lesson God is trying to teach us.  If we pray for patience, then when we are tested beyond our comfort and confidence level we ask for the challenge to be removed, how will we ever receive or gain that patience?  This is what also reminds me to trust God.  I probably had a different challenge in mind, one that I felt pretty confident that I could handle, when I prayed for patience.  But God had another, a better, more fitting, more valuable challenge for me.  If it tests or shakes my confidence then I need to realize that my confidence needs to be in God and all He can do for me and not in myself and my limited abilities.  In the end, I have the potential to be a much ‘bigger’ person if I trust Him to provide the lessons in my life that allow me to grow into that ‘bigger’ person.  Why would I cheat myself of that?  The answer to this is really the key for each of us, and I believe for a lot of people it is fear based.  Once we identify and conquer this fear, we will be content and have that “peace that surpasses understanding” Philippians 4:7

It is natural when ‘bad’ things are happening to us that we pray for them to be removed or taken away, but isn’t this actually us being tempted to run away or avoid the very experience or lesson God is trying to teach us?   Is impatience actually the temptation we need to overcome?  Patience can only be acquired by enduring the very trials that are so overwhelming and uncomfortable that we question our ability to overcome them.  That’s why this is a test of our faith.  

Never pray for an easier life — pray to be a stronger person!

Never pray for tasks equal to your power — pray for power equal to your tasks.

Then doing your work will be no miracle — you will be the miracle.   Phillips Brooks

1 Corinthians 16:13

“Be men of courage, be strong.”

I hope this is encouraging to you.  I know when I remind myself of these things, I do feel stronger, more humble, more grateful, more hopeful and more trusting in God that He really does love me and have a purpose for the seemingly inexplicable events in my life.

Laurie :)

Grounding....

 Today I am reminding myself what it means to me to be a counselor.  It's not just the honest interaction between myself and others, it's not that I'm 'helping people' (although I do value that).  Mostly I think it is that I am following God's direction in my life.  He gave me the skills I need to counsel those He puts in my life and I must trust Him to lead me where He wants me to go.  In this process, I am always learning, and so are those I counsel.  This is a beautiful relationship and I’m so blessed for each and every one of you who are a part of this.

But for today, I want to focus on counseling in general.  As many of you already know, the first step to solving a problem is to admit that you have a need that is not being met and desire a change that.  As Henry Cloud puts it, “We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.” 

God has made us with a variety of needs including spiritual, physical, emotional, psychological, and intellectual and He is ready and able to supply these needs.  When making important decisions, He provides scripture, guidance from the Holy Spirit and wisdom from people in our lives who provide godly examples and advice.  But we must seek it out.

What amount of pain will it take for you to stop procrastinating and make the change?  Is Fear in the way?  You have the power to do it.  So why are you not doing it?  Fear is a lack of trust and faith in God.  But why would we doubt Him, our loving Creator?  If you are suffering, godly counseling is often healing and should not bring shame or embarrassment.  Godly counseling reminds us all to rely on God as the main source of healing, integration, balance, wholeness, well-being, safety and approval. 

In John 5:1-9 it says,  “After this there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. Now there is in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate a pool, which is called in Hebrew, Bethesda, having five porches. In these lay a great multitude of sick people, blind, lame, paralyzed, waiting for the moving of the water. For an angel went down at a certain time into the pool and stirred up the water, then whoever stepped in first, after the stirring of the water, was made well of whatever disease he had.”

“Now a certain man was there who had an infirmity thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he already had been in that condition a long time, He said to him, ‘Do you want to be made well?'”

“The sick man answered Him, ‘Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Rise, take up your bed and walk.’ And immediately the man was made well, took up his bed and walked. And that day was the Sabbath.”

This man was in the company of others who knew of his ailments, yet they apparently did not offer help him to the pool.  I think it’s so interesting that Jesus asked him, “Do you want to be made well?”  I cannot imagine there is any doubt that he wanted to be well, but this man had to desire to change, admit the desire and willingness to do what was necessary to change, and trust God to help him make that change.  I always wonder what he did with the rest of his life?  And there are so many things to talk about in this passage, but I will save those for another post. 

So while I am facing many changes in my life right now, I am reminded to completely trust in God.  For me that means:

I am not afraid because I trust and believe He will provide my needs

I will keep my focus on Him and what He wants me to do

I will follow His lead and not get ahead of Him or lag behind

If I feel fear creeping up, I will immediately identify it and turn it over to God

If I don’t receive what I am expecting, then I need to ask God to show me another direction.  Maybe this door has been closed so that another can open.

But mostly, I need to trust the changes in my life to be from God and embrace them.  

Do you need to make changes in your life?

Is your life changing and you don't want it to?

Remember to trust in God and turn to those in your life who are equipped and ready to help you during this time of transition to a better place.